Wednesday, April 15, 2009

The Aphrodisiacs of Today

Dammit, all this while I thought that one had to be sensitive, romantic, interesting, courteous etc etc to get a girl's attention, but how wrong I was! Damn this world of books and novels which are filled with hundreds of pages of how a man should struggle to win his damsel's heart. But all that was just trash, i.e. if advertisements are to be believed. Originally it was just AXE and other deodorants who were responsible for enlightening us about how spraying yourself could get you your dream chic. But now others are following suit.
Almost all bike ads now come with the same storyline, guy on the road with his new bike and abracadabra, women go crazy! Weirdest thing in the bike ads is how the girl sitting behind the guy starts causing the background music to change to sensual feminine moans and groans. Damn, and here people read books about technique and stuff to evoke such responses from women.

Then we have the usual, underwear ads; which nowadays are exploring the wild side of the "Bharatiya Nari" types of women, i.e. wearing sarees and stuff... and yes, moaning in the background music.

But the weirdest ad, the one which caused me to write this post was the new Panasonic ad with Ranbir Kapoor. The entire ad focuses on a stream of women entering the guy's house, apparently coz he has an awesome TV. Obviously the women make suggestive gestures and moves, but obviously that was because of the TV and not coz of Ranbir, thats bcoz at the end of the ad, a geeky version of Ranbir gets all the babes after he installs the same TV.

I'm waiting for the day Saffola oil starts asking us to buy their latest low cholestrol oil pack, so that men could get in bed with hot women.
The ad would go like this -

Two men enter a shopping mall, hot chic notices them, First Man buys Dhara or some other brand, woman gives him the thumbs down. Second Man walks and buys Saffola with low cholestrol. Woman smiles and makes suggestive gestures at him, they walk out together, woman looks at screen and says "I like my men with low cholestrol"... screen fades to black, obviously with moaning sounds in the background!

Anyways, the point is that ads are really getting dumber by the day. Aamir Khan's recent Tata Sky ad as an old Sardarji is a welcome change, such ads should be made more often. But marketing is about success, and the only reason that ads involving "moaning background sounds" are becoming the order of the day, is probably because they're more successful.

I'll carry on doing the usual, non-advert style methods of impressing women, i.e. until the day my imaginary Saffola ad is actually aired! That day i'll buy Axe, a new bike, VIP Frenchie, Panasonic TV and finish off with Saffola oil to seduce my chic!

3 comments:

Amit J said...

totally agree with you....if only chics would come(or some alternate spelling with similar pronunciation) that easily,then lions wouldn't have to waste so much time fighting each other off for mating rights...they could just wear a frenchie and ROAR!...he gets laid(though in the current recession,he might just get laid off!)

Anonymous said...

The saffola ad is not far away. I'm sure some dude in some advert office will be thinking on these lines!Advertisement is becoming pervertisement.

Shantanu said...

ha ha! lovely post! :)